This is issue 1 of a film zine written in America that found its way to Duderocket a little while ago. I meant to review this a lot earlier but I misplaced my copy of the zine for a while, so my apologies go out to the zinester behind it.
I like the idea of film zines a lot... the internet is awash with film-related blogs and it can be a bit overwhelming to wade through sometimes, so in a way it's nice to know that there are some freedom fighters out there still fighting the good fight for print-zines that aren't focused on music or the ego of some indie nobody.
My love of zines actually started with sci-fi zines...
I have read one or two issues of Samuel Condon’s “Honest” in the past, and they’ve all been super depressing. They’re basically a dude capturing and sharing the sad moments in his life via pictures and words. This issue is aiming for that same kinda vibe once again, except this time Samuel comes off as a total weirdo creep. It’s about a girl he was seeing. He only refers to her as "sweetie" and "princess". The girl went to Thailand on a photography trip without him. She was sick upon her return and seemingly wanted him to leave her alone. When she got better she tried to avoid him, but he kept pestering her and eventually she had to get her dad to forcibly ask him to stop stalking her.
I've never worked in a supermarket and in terms of shitty day jobs, in a way I'm kind of bummed that I didn't.
It pays better than hospitality or general retail and if you play your cards right, you can avoid customers. A mate of mine works the nightfill shift and has no complaints, other than the timing.
Foxes in a Supermarket is a collaboration between two supermarket drones named Interesting Dave and a chick writing under the name of Greg.
Greg's half of the zine is an honest bitter rant against customers and bitchy supervisors named Michelle.
Oh what the fuck, I just finished reviewing this guy's last zine and then I pick up the next one from the pile and it's the same fuckhead for round 2! Jesus christ. But hey, I can be professional about this. Below the line will be the words of a mind unsullied with the last zine's mediocrity. My mind is a clean slate and I will be objective.
Young zine-writing fellow has a chip on his shoulder about main-stream Australia's attitude towards everything. Needless to say, everyone else is a moron and this guy is like the Omega Man of being a regular dude with good manners et al.
If you like stream-of-consciousness rambling about petty issues to do with people not minding their p's and q's and on top of that, you like squinting and struggling with badly formatted text then have I ever got a treat for you. This zine. I don't want it and I will send it to you. Surely everyone needs to read the words of some guy they don't know complaining about the low-hanging fruit of social problems in Australia like racist bogans and construction workers yelling at girls (does this even happen??).
Now I'm going to hunt around for a picture of this guy (could be a girl, I guess) just so I can put a pasty little face to these shitty words. Actually, maybe it is a girl now I think about it. Doesn't matter really because my contempt is gender-blind.
God damn, this is a piece of shit. So bad it makes me regret starting to wade through this pile of zines for review. This arsehole thinks he's interesting enough to go through the complicated procedure of typing out a shitty story full of spelling mistakes and poorly laid out text, printing out that story and cutting up the lines to arrange messily all over an A5 turd which he charges $1 for.
The guy is also practically a stalker. I'm guessing the zine's concept is that he picks 'unreasonable vendettas' against people and instead of being a normal person and either getting over it or better yet, talking to them and calling them a fuckhead, our genius embraces his autism and goes the ultra-passive-aggressive route by writing a shitty story about a deaf girl he works with who he doesn't like very much and then goes about self-publishing it and mailing it all around Australia (or, the world??). People have been arrested for less and a better use of the author's time would be to DO NOTHING ABOUT THE PERSON HE DOES NOT LIKE and, more importantly, NOT BE A CREEPY WEIRD DUDE WHO DOES THIS KIND OF THING AND TRIES TO MAKE IT HIS "ART FORM".
And here's me, Australia's #1 fan of cripple humour, and I can't even enjoy his little plot deviation to describe a girl he went to school with who had a deformed hand but could still swim like a dolphin.
Write this douchebag hatemail to PO Box 523, Yarraville 30i3 (his typo in the post code - not mine. And what a cute one. Just enough so that we think he's not taking himself too seriously by proof reading his writing but also not erroneous enough so that you can't send him a thank you letter - an obvious calculated and deliberate mistake wins no respect in the world faux-faults).
'Small Victories' is a confused political zine from New Zealand (I think).
It starts and ends with Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows quotes (which in the words of the author, "you oughtta read") before lazily meandering through some anecdotal accounts dealing with Big Issues.
First off, we have a paragraph about some fellow throwing a tomoto at an embassy before police predictably got involved and didn't arrest the man but seemingly spoke to him (?) and our heroes surrounded the constabulatory and argued with them before one man sang and no one else joined in and then they all let the cop car's tyres down before running off with a smug feeling of victory over the extrajudicial liberation of some air from a rubber prison. I don't know what to think about that one.
Next we have the story of mob justice after a police officer was acquitted of rape twice after a jury according to law decided by a jury of his peers and then on the very next page we've got a few words about how outrageous it was that someone else was prosecuted for belonging to a terrorist organisation. Seems like people just wanna get outraged and can't decide whether they like people being put on trial or whether they don't.
And so it goes on for a few pages with some cutesy cut-out pictures thrown in for a bit of light relief.
I like the little guy and all but what we have here is typical low-brow anarchist zine chit-chat with a bit of Harry Potter fanfiction thrown in so as you fuck world trade and die for someone else's oil profits, you can also imagine that you're Ron Weasley fighting against the Death Eaters and hunting for Horcruxes to kill Voldemort aka GEORGE W. BU$H.
Read it here: http://zinelibrary.info/files/small%20victories.pdf
This issue of YOU is just a postcard with the words “YOU DON’T NEED AN IPAD” written on the back. I get it, I really do. He’s tearing down the boundaries. He’s defying definition. Everything is a zine, “man”. But in my humble opinion, it’s just getting silly now. I mean soon the dude will be writing words in his own shit on napkins and distributing them around the place. “HERE! READ MY ZINE!” Uh, dude… that’s just a bit of paper with your name written on it in… what the fuck, is that shit? “YES YOU ARE CORRECT, THAT IS SHIT! THAT IS MY SHIT! IT’S MY ZINE! I AM A ZINESTER! PEOPLE FROM MELBOURNE LOVE ME! I AM A VISIONARY!”
YOU is an Australian zine. YOU is free. YOU can get copies from the Sticky Institute.
Death of a Scenester is a zournal that collects together various writers contributing to a shared topic. For issue 2 it's Boys. It's quite a meaty zine, nearly 80s pages long, and it took me a while to read this as I only felt comfortable reading it at home. I mean... it's called 'Boys' and it has a picture of a boy's face on it. In this modern pedophile-conscious society I just didn't really want co-workers or strangers to see me reading it as it could cause potential confusion. Even just with reading it at home I got some strange looks from my partner.
There are a variety of stories within these covers. Some have a pretty loose approach to the theme of 'boys' but weren't any the worse for it. Some, I have to confess, didn't seem to me to be about boys in the slightest. I could've done without the poetry, but hey - that's just me. I didn't really get the Lady Primrose Girly Girl thing, especially as it seemed to be part 6 of an ongoing series. Also, Freak by Anne Witherall looks like a series of random extracts from a larger novel, so I have to admit that I only skimread it. Joke or not, I'm just not interested in reading the middle parts of a novel.
Anyway, those are only minor niggles, the bulk of the contributions are excellent. My favourites were Miles the Monkey, Hoop, the opening memoir about the Pet Shop Boys, the pieces by Eddy Burger and Matt Ford and The Last Gasps of Boyhood. I think the idea of a zournal works best when the articles/stories are either relatively short or broken up into easily read sections. I tended to lose interest whenever a longer piece came along, and I guess there's always that risk when it comes to putting in a long piece. If you read a short piece and you don't like it you tend to still read all of it because it's short. If it's a long piece and the reader doesn't like it then the reader doesn't really give it the same chance because they stop reading before they get to the end. Just an observation.
My favourite stories were the ones where people wrote openly about their childhoods. I think there's a lot potential for further zines along those lines. This zournal is definitely worth checking out, the scope of variety in it ensures that everyone will find in it something that tickles their fancy.
Yes, that's right, 110 issues! I didn't think Australian music zines got to that many issues. This issue is the 2nd part of a 30th Anniversary Edition, which means the zine started back in 1980.
Now, as I have no prior experience of the zine, I'm finding it hard to work out if it's normally like this or not. Issue 110 is a zine "attempting to document the activity of underground and alternative bands in Adelaide and South Australia from the mid 1970's to the present day". So it's full of retrospective bios on various Adelaide bands, has a 'whatever happened to' section for people wondering what their favourite Adelaide legend is up to, an obits section, etc.
This is a pleasant little A6-sized zine that I'm guessing is focused on all things Newcastle. I haven't seen previous issues of this zine so I can't really comment on that, but this issue is the second part of a series about letterboxes, and is subtitled "100 Letterboxes of Newcastle Part Two". I imagine there will be two more parts to follow, as this issue concerns itself with street numbers 26-50.
It's basically drawings of letterboxes from around Newcastle, arranged in a numerical order based on their numbers. But don't let that put you off, it's a LOVE AFFAIR with letterboxes. These are great, detailed line drawings that capture the souls of letterboxes from Australia's great suburbs. I can appreciate the level of care that has obviously gone into this project, it's a cool gimmick and there's a wide variety of different kinds of letterboxes, and I liked the style of illustration.
It also features a cool little (true) story about a guy assaulting a postie for delivering junk mail, some facts about letterboxes and tips for recieving the mail. Be warned though, it retails for $5, which is pretty darn steep for a zine of this size. Maybe you could team up with a friend and buy a copy to share between you?
Go here to see the drawings and buy the zines - Newcastle Productions